drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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