Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself

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(902): she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself http://tfl.nu/wlq8

Replies (1) Good night (748) Bad night (2628)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time

(1-763): View more from Minnesota

Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.

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(763): So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time (1-763): Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother. http://tfl.nu/6l4l

Replies (29) Good night (1165) Bad night (2727)
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(269): View more from Michigan

Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?

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(269): Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not? http://tfl.nu/k8n6

Replies (37) Good night (3298) Bad night (891)
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(516): View more from New York

ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront

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(516): ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront http://tfl.nu/ih22

Replies (46) Good night (1114) Bad night (4543)
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(925): View more from California

He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"

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(925): He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest" http://tfl.nu/ei63

Replies (12) Good night (3829) Bad night (555)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.

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(248): I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial. http://tfl.nu/t70i

Replies (12) Good night (7128) Bad night (980)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.

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(612): I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine. http://tfl.nu/l3m4

Replies (8) Good night (3483) Bad night (875)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.

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(704): My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search. http://tfl.nu/gxvg

Replies (2) Good night (607) Bad night (2023)
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(765): View more from Indiana

I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.

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(765): I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship. http://tfl.nu/nv2q

Replies (41) Good night (1179) Bad night (3073)
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(916): View more from California

But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.

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(916): But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening. http://tfl.nu/sf5x

Replies (2) Good night (972) Bad night (1465)
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(585): View more from New York

remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that

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(585): remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that http://tfl.nu/fcdo

Replies (8) Good night (472) Bad night (1023)
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(604): View more from British Columbia

The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.

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(604): The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her. http://tfl.nu/woml

Replies (7) Good night (1784) Bad night (607)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine

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(314): Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine http://tfl.nu/rnj9

Replies (11) Good night (643) Bad night (1302)
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(804): View more from Virginia

I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night

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(804): I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night http://tfl.nu/3prr

Replies (1) Good night (944) Bad night (313)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?

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(775): Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck? http://tfl.nu/o867

Replies (6) Good night (461) Bad night (193)

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