i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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