So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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