How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.