her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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