Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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