grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
