i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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