I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I can't put those talents on a resume
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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