he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
dude. I can hear the air.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize