Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
