idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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