i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
