It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
