you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Why is your signature on my underwear?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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