Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
