I accidentally had phone sex last night
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize