Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
