My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize