just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
