so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
