He is an equal opportunity slut.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
