2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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