another moral hangover. fuck.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
