This girl is more easily done than said...
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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