just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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