Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
