I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
