i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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