So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
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Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
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