How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I pour the whiskey from now on
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize