See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize