In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
ttyl tear gas
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize