Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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