i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
