i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize