My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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