I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
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Strip Mario-Kart
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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