I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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