Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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