i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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