i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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