my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
