they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
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