oh god the rape fog is back!
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
