Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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