My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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