playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
