i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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