Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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