K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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